Power Over Others is Anti-Christ

On Wednesday we published a statement on our Facebook Page that created quite a stir. Part of the reason for this seems to be because readers tend to import their own assumptions into the statement, which can result in missing what was actually said and arguing with what has been assumed. Here is the statement... Continue Reading →

Do No Harm

We will start with the first. When an abuse victim brings information to you, asking for help with an abusive situation, your first obligation is to act in the interests of their safety. They are taking a great risk in coming to you and exposing what is happening in their life. They fully expect that any action they take to expose the abuse is likely to result in retaliation, and they are hoping that you will help protect them. They are at least hoping that you won’t make it worse.

The Refuge

God is a refuge for the oppressed, and He has sent out a command to save those who trust him. When you need deliverance from the hand of the wicked, from the unrighteous and cruel, you can call on him, and He will deliver. We are utterly confident in this truth! (Psalm 71:1-7) How can... Continue Reading →

A Letter to a Pastor

Dear Pastor, I appreciate your desire to understand abuse and your heart to help the hurting in your community and church. The first thing you need to know is that abuse is extremely deceptive, and far too many pastors trust their own ability to discern a lie. One consistent characteristic of those who have worked... Continue Reading →

Love Produces Fearless Freedom

The abuser frequently professes to love their victim, but their love ends up being nothing more than a confusing counterfeit. In fact, the abuser’s most fundamental problem is actually a lack of love, more specifically a lack of love for others. (They are very good at loving themselves.) The truth is that, regardless of what... Continue Reading →

Power, Relativism, and The Good Samaritan

There is a saying that “power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely,” and this idea has tempted many to conclude that power must be the problem. It is not. Recent scholarship actually indicates that the question of power being an inevitable corrupting influence is much more complex and nuanced than the above saying suggests, and... Continue Reading →

You Cannot Redeem the Beast

In a previous post we looked at the abuser who uses manipulations to quickly sweep the romantic victim off their feet, only to betray them later. Disney's "Frozen" provided us our first red-flag example, and thankfully, in that case our storytellers avoided making the mistake of romanticizing the abuser into an impossibly tidy happy ending.... Continue Reading →

Subversive, Harmless, and Wise

For the Christian, confronting abuse is spiritual battle. The bottom line is that you are bringing the light of the gospel to bear on a very dark situation. You are speaking the truth into a world that depends on deception. You are genuinely confronting a dangerous situation, and you need to be prepared. Jesus was... Continue Reading →

Early and Decisive is Best

The sad reality is that ineffective or incomplete efforts to help an abusive relationship usually only end up making things much worse. Some might think that intervening on behalf of a victim and forcing the abuser to get help is a good idea, but this is actually very dangerous. The most likely result is an... Continue Reading →

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